giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
My cat gives me a boner
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
