sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize