We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
