u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I think a kid would responsible me up
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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