There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
