Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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