Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
he fucked my hip out of place.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
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