that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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