apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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