I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Randomize
