Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
