when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
