so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
