before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
