if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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