IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
