what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
