Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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