I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
