I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
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