Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
