You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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