either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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