Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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