She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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