another moral hangover. fuck.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Randomize