another moral hangover. fuck.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
