so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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