are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize