whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
