are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
