Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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