I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
