I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I'm sobbing to NWA
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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