my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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