I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize