You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
