READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
