Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
