RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize