my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
