talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
