did you get engaged???
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize