8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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