At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
