i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize