I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
