Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize