Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
