You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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