every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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