she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
How does one acquire holy water?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
